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101 Bojack Horseman Quotes

    The show BoJack Horseman is unlike anything else.

    It’s packaged as a dark comedy about a washed-up celebrity horse.

    However, it quickly becomes a surprisingly deep exploration of human flaws, mental health, and the search for happiness.

    I found myself relating to the characters’ struggles in ways I never expected from a cartoon.

    That incredible resonance is exactly why the show’s quotes stick with you.

    They cut through the typical Hollywood fluff with a brutal, raw honesty that is both hilarious and heartbreaking.

    These quotes speak to the messy, confusing reality of being alive.

    I’ve personally used many of these lines to process my own confusing emotions.

    If you are ready for some laughs mixed with serious introspection, this collection is perfect.

    Here are 101 of the most memorable BoJack Horseman quotes that will make you laugh, think, and maybe even cry.

    Funny BoJack Horseman Quotes

    The humor in this show is so quick and often comes from a place of deep cynicism, which is why it always makes me laugh out loud.

    Whenever I am feeling annoyed with the world, I turn to these quotes.

    They are the show’s way of using sharp wit and hilarious satire to poke fun at the absurdity of Hollywood, fame, and just being alive.

    • That’s the problem with life, right? Either you know what you want and you don’t get it, or you get what you want and then you don’t know what you want
    • Everything is pointless, and nothing matters, and I’m miserable, so I got that going for me
    • Life is a series of compromises and the key is to not compromise so much that you end up like me
    • Why did I move to this town? Oh right, because I’m a narcissistic, self-destructive idiot
    • I hate the smell of hospitals. It smells like clean sadness
    • The key to being happy isn’t a search for meaning. It’s to just keep yourself busy with dumb, meaningless nonsense
    • It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day. That’s the hard part
    • I need you to tell me I’m a good person
    • My life is a party I am not invited to
    • You know, it’s not the destination, it’s the journey. But also, sometimes it’s the destination
    • I bought a boat. I’m going to sail around the world. What’s the worst that could happen?
    • I’m responsible for my own happiness? I can’t even be responsible for my own breakfast
    • You can’t just keep doing bad things and then feel bad about it. You need to be better
    • When you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags
    • I’m too sad to function. I’m like a sad desk lamp

    Sad & Emotional Quotes

    These are the quotes I turn to when I need to feel seen.

    The show is unmatched in its ability to capture the quiet, persistent agony of depression and loneliness.

    These lines aren’t sugar-coated.

    They are raw expressions of inner turmoil that made me realize I wasn’t the only one feeling lost or struggling to find happiness.

    They are painful, but incredibly honest.

    • I’m not crying. I just have a little bit of the outdoors in my eye
    • There’s no such thing as deep down. We’re all shallow, all the way down
    • I need to be told I’m a good person
    • You know, it’s funny, when you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags
    • The only thing that makes me happy is being drunk and then waking up and doing it again
    • Closure is a made-up thing by Steven Spielberg to sell movie tickets
    • I do not like the word closure. I think it’s condescending
    • The world is a godless, empty place, and we are all going to die
    • Nothing on the outside can fix what’s broken on the inside
    • What are you doing here? I was just lonely
    • You gotta do it every day—that’s the hard part
    • The only good thing about me is that I have a very loud alarm clock
    • I think you are good, but you are trapped in a bad situation
    • Sometimes I think I was born with a leak, and I’m just desperate to fill it
    • Life is just a long, sad song

    BoJack’s Self-Reflective Quotes

    These are the moments when BoJack breaks through his defenses and has a flash of brutal clarity about his own behavior.

    Reading these quotes has always helped me confront my own avoidance and self-sabotage.

    These quotes are moments of painful, honest self-awareness that show his struggle to be a better person, even when he constantly fails.

    • I just want to be loved
    • I don’t know what to do with my hands
    • I gotta go. I have a very important appointment. I’m going to cry in the shower
    • I am a garbage person, but I am trying to be better
    • It’s so easy to be seduced by the idea of an easy fix
    • I am responsible for my own happiness? I can’t even be responsible for my own breakfast
    • Every time I try to do something good, I just make things worse
    • I should stop getting my self-worth from my job
    • I just feel like there’s no meaning to anything
    • I’m a mess, but I’m working on it
    • I’m tired of trying to be the good guy
    • I feel like I’m constantly drowning in mediocrity
    • I need an escape, but I can’t find one
    • I am too self-aware to be happy
    • I wish I could quit me

    Quotes from Other Characters

    The supporting cast provides such rich depth, offering perspectives that are often wiser, or at least more functional, than BoJack’s.

    I particularly love the drive and cynical optimism of Princess Carolyn and the grounded clarity of Diane.

    These quotes often serve as necessary reality checks, delivering comedy and truth in equal measure.

    • Princess Carolyn: You gotta get your own life together. You can’t just keep hoping I’m gonna fix things
    • Diane: The key is to not compromise so much that you end up like him
    • Mr. Peanutbutter: The universe is a cruel, uncaring void. The key to being happy isn’t a search for meaning. It’s to just keep yourself busy with dumb, meaningless nonsense
    • Todd: You know, I think it’s important to have boundaries
    • Princess Carolyn: I’m a goddamn superstar and I’m gonna get what I want
    • Diane: There is no such thing as deep down. We’re all shallow, all the way down
    • Mr. Peanutbutter: What is this, a crossover episode?
    • Todd: Good job being a person!
    • Princess Carolyn: I’m not sad. I’m just tired. I’m tired of being a savior
    • Diane: I need to know that I’m a good person
    • Mr. Peanutbutter: The middle ground is where the magic happens
    • Todd: Hooray! Question mark?
    • Princess Carolyn: Settle. Because you’re going to be a mother and you’re going to love it
    • Diane: Maybe I’m just incapable of being truly happy
    • Mr. Peanutbutter: The future is an illusion

    Philosophical & Deep Quotes

    When the show pulls back from the jokes, it delivers truly profound insights that have made me pause the episode to think.

    These quotes delve into the meaning of existence, the elusive nature of happiness, and the effort required to change.

    They are the core of the show’s intellectual depth, making you question why you do what you do.

    • It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier
    • That’s the thing about a void. It never goes away
    • There’s always an escape route
    • The trick is to not look down
    • You can’t have a happy ending, because the story keeps going
    • You can’t keep doing bad things and then feel bad about it, like that makes it okay
    • It’s never too late to be the person you want to be
    • Every story has a turning point, and this is yours
    • We are the sum of our choices
    • Life is a pit, and we are all just trying to get out
    • There is no grand meaning; you have to make your own
    • Don’t stop dancing
    • Sometimes you just have to take the leap
    • The key to happiness is low expectations
    • It takes a long time to realize how truly miserable you are

    Relationship & Love Quotes

    The show is brutally honest about how messy and hard relationships are.

    These quotes reflect the failure, heartbreak, and desperate hope for connection that the characters constantly experience.

    They taught me that love is complicated, often painful, but always necessary, even if it doesn’t end in a tidy Hollywood conclusion.

    • I need you to be honest with me. Do I make you happy?
    • I love you, and I am going to marry you, but you need to do something about your depression
    • The relationship I have with myself is the hardest one
    • You know, the thing about me is, I have a big heart, but I don’t know how to use it
    • When you find a good thing, you hold onto it
    • It takes a lot of effort to pretend I’m normal
    • It’s amazing that you can go from being strangers to lovers to strangers again
    • People romanticize things that aren’t good for them
    • I want to tell you how I feel, but I don’t know how
    • If you tell people you love them, they might leave you
    • My heart is an empty house
    • I thought I was ready to settle down, but I was wrong
    • You can’t save people; you can only love them
    • I just want someone to look at me
    • It’s a good feeling to have someone to come home to

    Conclusion

    What truly defines BoJack Horseman and its quotes is the way it gives you a full emotional workout.

    One moment, you’re laughing at a pitch-perfect joke about celebrity excess, and the next, you’re gut-punched by a line about loneliness that feels almost too personal.

    The show is brilliant because it never lets the humor distract from the heartbreak, nor the sadness obscure the sharp wit.

    These quotes serve as a mirror, showing us that our flaws, our self-sabotage, our sadness, our desperate need to be loved are universal.

    It is a strange comfort to know that even a cartoon horse struggles with existence.

    Let these words remind you to keep going, because as the show says, every day it gets a little easier, but you have to do it every day.